Everyone knows that high self-esteem is important. But then, how do you go about building one? Since we’re all born with different traits, self-confidence comes easier to some than others. Building strong self-esteem can take work, dedication, and persistence. Here are seven ways to groom and grow your self-esteem.
1. Go easy on yourself.
It’s interesting how people with a developing sense of self are harder on themselves than those with high self-esteem. It’s very common to see them trying to be as perfect as possible, dotting every I and crossing every T. The only problem with this approach is that it’s impossible to be perfect.
As human beings, we’re bound to make mistakes. Errors are a combination of our lack of knowledge and skills and general humanity. Accepting that everyone makes mistakes is a massive step toward building self-esteem.
It may also help to understand that mistakes are how you learn. It’s funny that people with high self-esteem tend to make more mistakes than anyone else. They know that the errors don’t define them, and they charge every problem in front of them. Their motto is, “Fail, learn, succeed, repeat.”
2. Hang out with positive people.
Negative atmospheres can be very damaging to one’s mental health. You may have a great attitude and be bustling with positive energy, but all it takes is one negative person to undo all of that. You can identify a negative person by their outlook on life. They can’t find the bright side of anything, even if it’s so clearly there.
They are also fond of criticizing everything they see, from events to people. If you hear your flaws announced often enough, you start to believe it. Soon, you’re in the same gravity of negativity and low self-esteem.
Instead, find people with positive energy to hang around. It’s crucial to be in the right company because being alone isn’t much better. Prolonged isolation can negatively affect your mental health, which then affects how you see yourself.
3. Address your flaws.
Even though our flaws make us human, we don’t have to carry them our whole life. Addressing your weaknesses is a milestone on the path to becoming a better version of yourself. Plus, it can help you accept yourself better.
Accepting your flaws without addressing them may give you high self-esteem, but it will give you low social value. People will avoid you because of your lack of proactivity and desire to become better.
If you tend to be mean when you’re upset, try to be more mindful, and apologize when you slip up. You’ll feel good knowing that you apologize for every time you lashed out at someone. If your flaws are body image-related, finding ways to fix it can give you more confidence. For example, if you have gynecomastia, compression shirts can help you achieve a trim look. You can get compression shirts at Confidence Body Wear (http://www.confidencebodywear.com/product/gynecomastia-compression-shirt/)
4. Focus on being yourself.
Another source of low self-esteem can be found when you compare yourself to other people. You turn on the TV or log onto Facebook, and you see everyone who’s doing better than you. It’s also possible to find individuals with the exact problems as you, who were able to solve it in no time at all. This game of ‘spot the difference’ is one of the worst things you can do to yourself.
As we discussed earlier, no one is perfect. Everyone has flaws, weaknesses, and mistakes. Nobody shares their shortcomings on social media. Instead, all you see are stories edited, filtered, and cropped to perfection. It’s better to pay attention to yourself and where you’re trying to go.
Keep the pressure off by staying true to who you are. Sometimes, you need time to figure out what that is, but that’s perfectly fine. Take time to know what you truly want and follow your passion. You’ll feel much better because of it.
5. Manage your expectations.
Expectations about what should be can give us a lot of heartache and disappointment. Disappointments from unmet expectations can get you frustrated, stressed, and even angry. Unless you can manage your feelings effectively, you may even feel yourself breaking down or lashing out.
Expectation management begins with understanding what happened in the past. If employees only get raises after their second year at your firm, it may not be wise to expect one after six months. While an excellent performance can help you bypass this rule, it’s better to stay realistic.
That way, if you get it, you’ll be glad. But then, if you don’t, you won’t be disappointed. You have to be careful, however, not to become negative while managing your expectations. Anticipate good things, but also know that they may not happen.
6. Practice gratitude.
As unusual as it may seem, people who exhibit a habit of gratitude usually have higher self-esteem. More than just picking things they are grateful for, these individuals are genuinely happy to have all the things they do. They understand how unpredictable life can be and are just glad to be where they are.
It’s not about being metaphysical, either. All you really need for a habit of gratitude is to identify the small things in your life. The breakfast that was cooked to perfection, the ten dollars you found wedged between your seat, or the excellent parking space – these little things make life worth living, and they deserve to be celebrated.
Gratitude is much easier when you have something significant to be grateful for, like starting a new relationship or a new car. Most people don’t need practice to be thankful for significant accomplishments. It’s the little things that need attention.
7. Identify and develop your strengths.
We all have strengths and weaknesses. We already talked about identifying and fixing your flaws, but what about your strengths? These are just as important, and they need work. Building your competency in your strong suits can help you become highly skilled.
Being the go-to guy for certain issues is a great confidence boost anytime. It starts by looking for things you’re naturally good at. You want tasks that come to you with minimal effort or input.
Thanks to the Internet, there’s limitless information on any single skill. Gather knowledge and build up your unique competence. As it grows, so will your confidence, self-esteem, and personal image.